Today is the 8th anniversary of my journey in Recovery.
The day before I began down the road there was wine, pills and vodka. The amount is lost in a blackout that had long since become the norm. I had been driving but that memory is also lost to me. That last day ended with me being left passed out on the on the driveway, to the disgust of the neighbors, who called the cops. After i physically and verbally assaulted a police officer my husband offered me the option of a return to residential treatment, which i had left 5 days before, or the end of the marriage. Both options sucked but treatment sucked less.
I would lying if i claimed that i had any intention of “working a program” or cooperating in any way. My career in drink and drugging began at 8years old and there was no way I could imaging functioning any other way. my sole intention, like every other detox, was to get clean enough to feel better and shut everyone up. enough to preserve the status quo of my marriage.
That’s not quite what happened, and while I write this I and present in a Recovery can bring. I am proud of being able to maintain a life without the need to use drugs or alcohol and have no problem being open about that with others. I was pushed into Recovery, and it has always been a smooth road, but today I embrace it, carry it to others, am a public face that life in Long Term Recovery is possible and life is great on the other side.
recovery4real 